she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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