I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
