I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
