Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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