It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
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