she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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