I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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