but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
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