dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize