No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Randomize
