ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i think i have herpe
just one?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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