Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize