It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize