just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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