Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
