Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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