No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
so let's talk penis.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
