I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
