I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
