Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
She told me I should be a condom model.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
