Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Randomize