I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I need a burrito and a hug.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
