All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
