it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
