the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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