You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
My ass is underappreciated
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
