Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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