you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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