Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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