dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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