why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
