Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
jump out the window naked night went bad
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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