My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
