idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
