I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
The air was thick with penises
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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