physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
