Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
