Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
