Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
