Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
All I want is dick and wine.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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