Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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