Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I miss vodka workout Fridays
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize