Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize