question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
