thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
