my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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