I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
