Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
