I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
