ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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